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The 8 People Seen At Polk During Finals Week

"The Sleeper The Sleeper takes up one of the precious cubicles with a plug to charge a laptop. Their hair is a mess and their face is stuck to the pages of their chemistry book. No one knows how long they’ve been in Polk or the last time they went outside. However, if they don’t wake up soon, they might miss the final they’ve been studying so hard for. Approachability: 7/10—Please, wake them up and get them some food.

[/media-credit] “The Sleeper”
The Sleeper takes up one of the precious cubicles with a plug to charge a laptop. Their hair is a mess and their face is stuck to the pages of their chemistry book. No one knows how long they’ve been in Polk or the last time they went outside. However, if they don’t wake up soon, they might miss the final they’ve been studying so hard for.
Approachability: 7/10—Please, wake them up and get them some food.

"The Group  There’s a mash-up of personalities in The Group. There’s one with their feet up, another feverishly typing, while the leader clutches at their hair, glaring at the one with their feet up. A fourth is on their phone, smirking because they actually got their bit of the project done. Together, they’re a black hole of worry brought on by procrastination.   Approachability: 2/10—Some of the members might be friendly, but the group leader might hit you with a book if you distract their team.

[/media-credit] “The Group”
There’s a mash-up of personalities in The Group. There’s one with their feet up, another feverishly typing, while the leader clutches at their hair, glaring at the one with their feet up. A fourth is on their phone, smirking because they actually got their bit of the project done. Together, they’re a black hole of worry brought on by procrastination.
Approachability: 2/10—Some of the members might be friendly, but the group leader might hit you with a book if you distract their team.

"The Talker  The Talker varies in volume. Some Talkers are just a low stream of mumbling about how it’s almost over, how their professor is the worst, how they should drop out and become a stripper. Others are much more audible, calling home in a state of panic or verbally checking off their to-do list.   Approachability: 8/10—How focused can they really be if they’re talking that much? Besides, someone needs to tell them to shut up.

[/media-credit] “The Talker”
The Talker varies in volume. Some Talkers are just a low stream of mumbling about how it’s almost over, how their professor is the worst, how they should drop out and become a stripper. Others are much more audible, calling home in a state of panic or verbally checking off their to-do list.
Approachability: 8/10—How focused can they really be if they’re talking that much? Besides, someone needs to tell them to shut up.

"The Caffienated  There’s a wild look in The Caffeinated’s eyes, a mixture of determination and coffee. Sure, they have a ten-page paper due at midnight, but if they can chug three cups of steaming coffee in two minutes, they can crank out half of that paper in an hour. If The Caffeinated also happens to be The Talker, someone save us all.  Approachability: 7/10—More than happy to talk, but don’t expect their undivided attention, as their caffeine level prevents them from doing only one action at a time.

[/media-credit] “The Caffienated”
There’s a wild look in The Caffeinated’s eyes, a mixture of determination and coffee. Sure, they have a ten-page paper due at midnight, but if they can chug three cups of steaming coffee in two minutes, they can crank out half of that paper in an hour. If The Caffeinated also happens to be The Talker, someone save us all.
Approachability: 7/10—More than happy to talk, but don’t expect their undivided attention, as their caffeine level prevents them from doing only one action at a time.

"The Scrambler  The Scrambler is flipping feverishly through pages of notes and chapter after chapter of their history book, trying to memorize the last 200 years of American history. If they don’t slow down soon, a paper cut is bound to happen and then the blood might make it kind of hard to read their notes. But that won’t stop them from frantically switching to biology and cell diagrams.  Approachability: 6/10—They’ll take a second to register that you’re talking to them, but they probably need a hug.

[/media-credit] “The Scrambler”
The Scrambler is flipping feverishly through pages of notes and chapter after chapter of their history book, trying to memorize the last 200 years of American history. If they don’t slow down soon, a paper cut is bound to happen and then the blood might make it kind of hard to read their notes. But that won’t stop them from frantically switching to biology and cell diagrams.
Approachability: 6/10—They’ll take a second to register that you’re talking to them, but they probably need a hug.

The Spreader– Based on the number of books lying open on the table, with notebooks and papers littered everywhere, it seems impossible that it all comes from one person. The Spreader needs room to think. They need room to breathe, or they just might have a panic attack. Even if they look like they’re only using one of the table’s four chairs, don’t ask to borrow any. They might need it for a footrest or to make a bed soon. Approachability: 5/10—They’re not dangerous, but they won’t fully comprehend anything you say.

[/media-credit] The Spreader– Based on the number of books lying open on the table, with notebooks and papers littered everywhere, it seems impossible that it all comes from one person. The Spreader needs room to think. They need room to breathe, or they just might have a panic attack. Even if they look like they’re only using one of the table’s four chairs, don’t ask to borrow any. They might need it for a footrest or to make a bed soon. Approachability: 5/10—They’re not dangerous, but they won’t fully comprehend anything you say.

The Observer Why they chose Polk as a place to get away from their studies, no one knows. But they’re sitting in the corner of Polk with no books, just watching the chaos in front of them, students yelling at printers and staring blankly at computer screens while they slam their third energy drink. The smirk on their face is almost evil. Approachability: 9/10—They might be able to crack a joke based on their observations, and everyone needs a laugh during these trying times.

[/media-credit] The Observer Why they chose Polk as a place to get away from their studies, no one knows. But they’re sitting in the corner of Polk with no books, just watching the chaos in front of them, students yelling at printers and staring blankly at computer screens while they slam their third energy drink. The smirk on their face is almost evil. Approachability: 9/10—They might be able to crack a joke based on their observations, and everyone needs a laugh during these trying times.

The Biter– The air around The Biter is 10 degrees colder than the rest of Polk. Their body has sucked up all of the warmth to make sure they don’t actually freeze while they glower at the study guide on the table, their teeth bared. Their hair is wild and their eyes are bloodshot because they refuse to blink and lose even a moment soaking in the information in front of them. One little disturbance could set them off, anything from someone laughing too loudly to someone dropping a pencil., Approachability: 0/10—Do not approach them unless you’re looking for a reason to end up in the hospital.

[/media-credit] The Biter– The air around The Biter is 10 degrees colder than the rest of Polk. Their body has sucked up all of the warmth to make sure they don’t actually freeze while they glower at the study guide on the table, their teeth bared. Their hair is wild and their eyes are bloodshot because they refuse to blink and lose even a moment soaking in the information in front of them. One little disturbance could set them off, anything from someone laughing too loudly to someone dropping a pencil., Approachability: 0/10—Do not approach them unless you’re looking for a reason to end up in the hospital.

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The 8 People Seen At Polk During Finals Week