When I was a kid, I remember thinking my parents had it all together. I longed for the days when I could be like them, when I could have it all together and understand everything. It wasn’t until I was older that this facade began to crack, and I had the unfortunate realization that they’re just figuring things out like everyone else. I say unfortunate not out of pity for my parents, but for myself. This meant that there would not, in fact, be a special switch that goes off when I turn 20— or even when I turn 40— that would allow me to just magically understand everything. Six years later, I became living proof. 

I was on the phone with Mom earlier today, telling her all the things I had to do this week. Then, I had this moment I can only describe as imposter syndrome. For those of you who may be unfamiliar with the term, the Merriam-Webster dictionary defines it as “a psychological condition that is characterized by persistent doubt concerning one’s abilities or accomplishments accompanied by the fear of being exposed as a fraud despite evidence of one’s ongoing success.” I couldn’t believe the things I was responsible for and the things expected of me, not because I think it’s outrageous or not doable, but because I can’t believe they let a (20-year-old) kid like me do these things. At that moment, I felt like I was 14 again. Then, I realized I never really left that place. I don’t think any of us do, we just get better at pretending and hiding it. 

Although my last couple of paragraphs could’ve fooled you, this article is not meant to depress you. It’s meant to shed light and create an open discussion about something we all go through. So, why not go through it together? Maybe we can learn something from each other. If not, then it’s just nice to know you’re not alone. Once you realize that everyone goes through this, you realize it’s inevitable. Inevitability breeds acceptance, and that’s where life begins! My older brother is 27, and he still feels this way. This is the same older brother who has a successful career and radiant social life, and even he still feels like a kid pretending to be an adult. 

So, don’t wait until you’ve got it all figured out to start living life, because living life is how you figure it out. Our 20s are meant for trial and error, so try everything you can. Yes, we are considered adults, but if we’re ever going to get a free pass, it would be now. Don’t listen to your adulthood imposter syndrome, and don’t allow it to run your life or stop you from pursuing your goals. If I listened to mine, I wouldn’t be where I am today.