Women in businesses spoke out about the hardships they have endured and the path they’ve followed to get through it at the 2024 We EmpowHER conference on March 2 in Oshkosh.
We EmpowHER, a women empowerment organization that started in 2017, annually features numerous guest speakers, including entrepreneurs, life coaches, executive directors and women in “leadership” programs. Many community partners like the Christine Ann Domestic Abuse Services, Fond du Lac Family Resource Center and ADVOCAP fund We EmpowHER and make it possible to hold free events. Theresa Menting, executive director of We EmpowHER, opened the local event at the Oshkosh Arena by thanking all of the women who attended and discussed We EmpowHER’s growth. Menting introduced the keynote speaker, Ali Starr, a high school basketball coach and life coach. Starr shared a story that impacted her. At the end of one basketball season, her team had only won three games. She was distraught and wanted to blame others because she didn’t want to be seen as a failure.
Then Starr called her father to let all her frustrations out and get advice. Her father simply told her that as long as they were happy with how they played and worked as a team, that was all that mattered.
“You showed up and put the work in, but it comes down to how much you want it and how happy you are with the result,” Starr said.
Starr said she learned that a way to improve was to be confident and proud of the path you took to get to the position you are in. She asked her players what they thought was best in the games and how they felt they could win. Soon after that, they won conference titles and championships. She explained that what you do to create outcomes changes your life, good or bad.
“Stop thinking about how you’re perceived, be comfortable with yourself, and ask for help,” Starr said.
We EmowHER included four breakout sessions on productivity, self-discovery, family and relationships and business and leadership.
Alecia Jacobson, a life coach, led the productivity breakout session, discussing how to ignite one’s spark and break the backburner cycle. She said women must put themselves first and bring out the real version of themselves that they’ve buried to please others.
Jacobson shared a story about her divorce and how that affected her life for a while. She said she didn’t want to be perceived as a bad mother because of the divorce and wanted to look strong. With that in mind, Jacobson signed up to teach Sunday school with little kids. After a few weeks, she was ready for it to be over. Whenever she came home from church, she felt drained and stuck with her life. She went through steps that helped her escape her rut and regain her confidence.
Jacobson said there are four steps to take in your life. First, stop caring about what other people think and do something for yourself.
Jacobson told a story about one of the people she was coaching. She said the women did everything she wanted to for her career, but she was unhappy with the outcome. For seven years, she’d worked at the job she had always wanted, but at the cost of coming home drained and unhappy. The woman felt guilty about leaving the job or speaking out because this is what she worked for and put her money in for. Jacobson said the woman thought she was too selfish to change her career.
Secondly, Jacobson said to believe in yourself. She said you have to honestly think that this is what you want for yourself and that you are ready to make decisions that will change your path for the better.
Priority is the third step. The decision to make a change is a challenge you should focus on overcoming. The last step is taking action, being consistent when prioritizing it. Jacobson said you have the right to say no when you set the boundaries. Also, you need to be comfortable recognizing that getting used to putting yourself first may take a while.
Another session featured women in business professionals panel. The panel included Kim Eschenbauch, a mindfulness and strength practitioner at Gallop; Wendy Babcock, a life coach; Kelly Northlee, a real estate agent and entrepreneur and Pa Lee Moua, executive director for the Institution for Leadership. A participant asked for advice for networking events.
“Know that you’re connecting with other people just like they want to do with you,” Eschenbauch said. “It’s about sharing, learning, and building those strong connections for the business.”
Moua added, “Keep an open mind; other people are nervous to talk with others, but you are networking for a reason.”
Another participant asked the panelists what fuels their passions and careers.
“Passion is who you are,” Babcock said.
“There are people you meet who can inspire and motivate you. You have to watch for people that drain you and what drain you,” Moua added. “Life-long learning, building communities, finding supportive outlets. Fitting in is a fantasy; being somewhere your voice is heard because you are always changing and evolving.”
